She’s A 10, But She Has Food Allergies

Adam Dietz
Slackjaw
Published in
4 min readApr 29, 2024

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Photo by Gardie Design & Social Media Marketing on Unsplash

My girl is fine and I mean, fine. She is an absolute work of art. I’m not talking about a Pollock. — my girl is more like a Monet or Georgia O’Keefe. She’s got these beautiful eyes, this voluminous hair, and her body, well let’s just say, it’s exactly as the 2002 America Ferrera movie describes. My girl is a 10 in any book, but the problem is, she’s got food allergies.

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Adam Dietz
Slackjaw

Comedy writer with work in McSweeney’s, Slackjaw, Points in Case, etc. Editor of the Yapjaw newsletter.